Learning communication for sex, learning communication for life

BSAB: Laughing During Sex

Why Is It Bad?

Wow. If this was a rule, I probably would never have had sex. In fact, if you’re never letting yourself laugh during sex, I have to ask, what ARE you doing? Are you just completely silent like a pair of mannequins? Is it just a bunch of grunts and moans? If you ask me, that’s pretty funny by itself. Humor is often recommended as a way to attract someone. Why should that stop at the sack? You’d be depriving yourself of a great way to continue connecting in general and connecting in particular over the experience you are trying to enjoy together.

What Can You Do Instead?

Sex can be awkward. Embrace it. While you’re at it, have a good laugh!

To be clear, I’m not saying you have to be funny during sex. I’m saying laughter is perfectly permissible and can even be part of your play.

In fact, for some people, laughter is a primary part of their fun. For example, have you ever heard of a tickle fetish, or “tickle torture” as a kink or fetish? It’s a thing and it’s totally natural to enjoy.

Sometimes laughter is our bodies’ natural response to sex. You may have heard of some people crying after sex, for seemingly no reason. Did you know that sometimes people laugh uncontrollably after orgasm? In both of these cases, it’s just our bodies trying to find a way to handle the copious amount of hormones being released all at once. Don’t worry if your partner is laughing. It might mean this was one of their better orgasms or that they just really needed it.

Laughing together is a great way to connect, to feel safe and comfortable together, and a wonderful way to keep things flowing. I wouldn’t recommend trying to make your bedroom romp into a stand-up comedy routine (your partner may not appreciate that), but you can laugh together over the fact that sex can be kinky and corny and awkward. And all of that is good and real.

See you next week.


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